Why I Stopped Fighting

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Hand-drawn art by Rupali Bhuva
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Por qué dejé de luchar
--por océano índigo

Cuando era adolescente, tuve una pelea con un chico mayor que pesaba al menos cincuenta libras más que yo. Era una pelea anunciada de antemano, por lo que much@s estudiantes se habían reunido para mirar. Recuerdo haber tenido la ventaja durante gran parte de la pelea, golpeándolo docenas de veces por cada golpe que él me dio. Lo tiré al suelo una y otra vez, usando su propio peso contra él.

En un momento, noté que una anciana miraba desde una ventana. Vi que me miraba con miedo en los ojos. ¿Pero por qué yo? ¡Yo era la buena en esta pelea! La discrepancia me sacudió. Nunca me había visto como alguien a quien temer. Y entonces se creó una brecha en quien yo sabía que era.

De repente, miré al chico con el que estaba peleando y vi a Jesús el Cristo mirándome. Miré a mi alrededor y la Conciencia Crística apareció en todos los que estaban allí. También entendí que él no tenía idea de que era el Cristo.

No, él estaba realmente convencido de que era un chico que me quería hacer daño. Pero yo sabía la verdad, así que no podía golpearlo de nuevo.

Aunque todavía podía hacer bloqueos. Una vez que dejé de pelear, logró tirarme al suelo por primera vez, se subió a mi pecho y comenzó a golpearme los hombros y los brazos mientras yo protegía mi cabeza. A pesar de todo, yo no estaba asustada o enfadada lo más mínimo. Toda mi ira se había disipado y sabía que estaría bien. Finalmente, escuché las sirenas de la policía, lo que lo incitó a bajarse de mí y correr.

Esa fue solo una de varias experiencias de satori que he tenido en mi vida. ¡Afortunadamente, el resto no están relacionadas con violencia! Cada vez, no necesitaba buscar la Verdad; Simplemente sabía que lo que era verdadero era verdadero y lo que era falso era falso. No hubo manipulación. La conciencia surgió de la Gracia. [...]
Visto con la comprensión de que todo surge dentro del Ser, de que todo es Conciencia, no dejamos de preocuparnos. No dejamos de ayudar. Simplemente lo hacemos con un equilibrio natural, como el agua que fluye de áreas de mayor presión a áreas de menor presión. Nadie necesita decirle al agua adónde debe ir; su naturaleza es simplemente fluir.

Al sumergir nuestra atención en el amor por la Conciencia, este mismo tipo de espacio se puede cultivar en la vida diaria. Conciencia de adoración. Entrégate por completo al amor en tantos momentos como puedas. Vive de rodillas, besando el suelo de la verdadera naturaleza.



Preguntas semilla para la reflexión: ¿Cómo te relacionas con la noción de estar en una situación de miedo sin tener ni rastro de miedo o la intención de hacer daño? ¿Puedes compartir una historia personal de un momento en que viste una situación difícil transformarse debido a la conciencia de una realidad más profunda? ¿Qué te ayuda a entregarte por completo al amor en tantos momentos como puedas?
Seed Questions for Reflection

How do you relate to the notion of being in a fearful situation without having a trace of fear or the intention to harm? Can you share a personal story of a time you saw a difficult situation transform due to an awareness of a deeper reality? What helps you see give yourself completely over to love in as many moments as you can?

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Add Your Reflection

9 Past Reflections
DN
Dawit Negassa Golga
Oct 3, 2022
Deeply touching, immensely elevating story!
ST
Sep 27, 2022
Ahhh! This story really connecting me with many incidents of transformation in my life. As a child, I was often upset by what I felt as injustice but mostly chose to hide. Sporadically anger arose and I would use my fists or an outburst of words. This has been a painful path for me but I have learned to allow myself to grieve and even enjoy my broken heart. This has led to deep healing in myself and with others, though sometimes taking many years. I still feel anger arise and can be mentally preoccupied with vengeful thoughts but no fists and rarely an outburst. This energy gets channeled into community organizing for international day of peace recently, annual Martin luther king day , poetry and peace dance events, and holding babies of all ages and sizes and shapes in my spiritual arms close to my heart and hairy chest.
JL
John Lerwill
Sep 27, 2022
I was bullied at school and never stood up for myself until one day (more than 60 years ago) it went too far.

Like the narrator of the above story it was a fight arranged so that the whole school knew about it and a great crowd assembled at the 'tip' to see it. For 10 minutes I *boxed* my way through - he not hitting me once. At that point I saw the futility of it all and just walked away. They all said "You were on top - why did you walk away?". I just smiled. I also had seen that we were all one and that the fight was totally futile.

That experience strengthened my conviction to the present day, aged 78.
TE
Sep 25, 2022
Beautiful passage! Key phrase for me is: "... a gap was created in who I knew myself to be." No longer being lost in the conditioned illusions of egoic "self", and recognizing a better fit is available. And as she says: "... this same type of spaciousness can be cultivated in daily life." I would say this is perhaps the biggest benefit in meditation, participating in Awakin circles, worship, and most of what we label as "spiritual" activities. She calls that better fit: "Love", but it's beyond just transient personal emotion, or playing a role in life, which we use the same word "love" to describe. Lovingkindness that includes the aggressor as well as the victim and observer, without limitation. "Justification" has no part, yet rendering aid, and preventing further harm are different actions, each an expression of compassion (which IS that Love).
KP
Sep 24, 2022
I was mugged at gunpoint by 4 young black men, probably only teenagers. They seemed scared themselves by what they were doing. The ot fear u had was that in their fear, they might accidentally shoot me. I felt compassion for them. What had happened to them that they would already have a gun and be mugging someone? I saw them as boys, afraid.
They only took my money which meant mercy because they left me with my lil flip phone, my credit card and metro card. I don't know if I saw Christ in them,but I did see humanity which held me in compassion. I think what helps is a breath and then compassion and then humanity which helps us to ask, 'what happened to this person to cause this behavior?' Then we can look from love.
BA
Barbara Sep 27, 2022
Yes, I believe it helps us tremendously to try to see them from the angle of what happened to them and they must be sad/hurt/lashing out.
DD
Sep 24, 2022
To be in a situation that is fearful to most without having a trace of fear or intention to harm takes being 1) brain dead or 2) psychotic or 3) extremely psychologically together or 4) very spiritually advanced. Any of those can result in a person being totally independent of and detached from the situation and having zero trace of fear or intention to harm. When I am aware that I and others with whom I very much disagree are one, are part of the same physical world as I, are part of the same consciousness as I, and are expressions of the same Oneness or God as I, I am in awareness of a deeper reality which results in transformation in me and in the situation. I don't give myself completely over to love in as many moments as I can. Actually I do that seldom. When I do give myself completely over to love, what helps me is living in and from awareness that we are one, and one is love.
JP
Sep 23, 2022
On the outer surface we all are different in shape, size, strength and in many other ways. On that level some may join hands with us in friendsip and some may punch us, beat us or even kill us. But when we go deeper we can see the Reality, the oneness, Christ consciousness, the unitive consciousness, the cosmic consciousness. In that state the egoic mind which creates division within us and between us gets disolved and we become children of God. That is essentially who we are. In that state there is no trace of fear or intention to harm. Sadly, most of us live on the surface and create walls of divisiveness and fight like cats and dogs. Once I was driving with my family to do a workshop for counselors. It was a rainy day. I had to stop at a gas station for filling up gas. As I was about to get out of my car, there were two guys who seemed to be very angry and hateful. One guy came out of the car, cursed me and poinetd his gun towars me. Something happened in my heart and felt for ... View full comment
DD
David Doane Sep 24, 2022
I found your paragraph and story of the man with the gun to be very meaningful. Thank you.