Love Is Not An Emotion

Image of the Week
Image of the Week

El Amor No Es Una Emoción
--por Barbara Frederickson
El amor, definido como micro momentos de resonancia positiva, puede ser, por lo tanto, la más significativa y consecuente de todas las emociones positivas. Debido al hecho de ser un estado único, distribuido a través de dos o más cerebros y cuerpos a la vez, la capacidad del amor para ampliar la mentalidad y construir recursos puede tener un alcance sustancialmente mayor.

El amor, entonces, no es simplemente otra emoción positiva. Más bien, es el fenómeno momentáneo a través del cual nos sentimos y nos convertimos en parte de algo más grande que nosotros mismos. De este modo, el significado en la vida puede surgir no de los grandes e irreales ideales utópicos del amor "feliz para siempre", sino de lo que el historiador de arte Nicholas Bourriaud llama "las micro-utopías del día de hoy" de positividad compartida. Ver el amor como resonancia de positividad también difumina los límites que rodean el concepto de emoción.
Muchas, si no la mayoría, de las descripciones científicas de las emociones ubican estos fenómenos afectivos dentro de los individuos, confinados dentro de la mente y la piel de una persona. En contraste, el concepto de resonancia de positividad se alinea con las perspectivas ofrecidas dentro de la psicología cultural que posiciona las emociones como desplegándose entre las personas a medida que interactúan. Ver las emociones como propiedades de los individuos puede ser de hecho un subproducto miope de la tendencia occidental a extraer perceptiblemente objetos focales de su entorno contextual. En contraste, posicionar el amor como un proceso dinámico que se despliega y unifica a dos o más individuos que interactúan ofrece parsimonia a los relatos de las funciones sociales de las emociones positivas.

Ver el amor como resonancia positiva también tiene implicaciones prácticas sobre cómo las personas pueden fortalecer sus relaciones, sus familias y sus comunidades. Tratar de mejorar esto directamente puede ser como decirle a un completo extraño "confía en mí" en ausencia de acciones confiables. Por el contrario, saber que las relaciones, las familias y las comunidades se fortalecen en la medida en que la positividad resuena entre las personas revela el valor de planificar y priorizar la positividad. Crear actividades y contextos seguros que permitan la conexión sensorial en tiempo real y respalden la aparición de emociones positivas compartidas se convierte en el camino para construir lazos sociales y comunidad. Esta guía puede ser especialmente valiosa dentro de las culturas urbanas contemporáneas que impulsan a las personas hacia conexiones sociales multitarea y mediadas por la tecnología. Como la novelista Ursula Le Guin dijo: "El amor no se limita a sentarse allí, como una piedra; Tiene que ser hecho, como el pan; Hecho de nuevo todo el tiempo, hecho nuevo ".




Preguntas semilla para la reflexión: ¿Cómo te relaciona con la noción de amor como un fenómeno momentáneo a través del cual nos sentimos y nos convertimos en parte de algo más grande que nosotros mismos? ¿Puedes compartir una historia personal de un momento en que sentiste amor de esta manera? ¿Qué te ayuda a crear un espacio para la resonancia de la positividad en tu vida?
Extraído de aquí.
Seed Questions for Reflection

How do you relate to the notion of love as a momentary phenomenon through which we feel and become part of something larger than ourselves? Can you share a personal story of a time you felt love in this way? What helps you create a space for positivity resonance in your life?

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9 Past Reflections
SA
Sarah
Dec 19, 2019
This piece isbrilliant goldenwisdom. Inever thought of giving/ choosing tolove as a choice equal to giving/ choosing to trust. This context gives license to an expandedexperience, new endlesspossibilities,taking 100 percent responsibility fordeep creativity and self expression, generosity, new conversations and requests. It is anew level of intelligence inclusive, no excuses, no ceiling. God is speaking.
QJ
Nov 20, 2018
What is LOVE is one of the Greateat Questiins anyone can ask of themselves. The answer is foundational to one's life experience.  I understand  LOVE to be LIFE it's self. And to experience life we only have THIS moment. One breath away doesn't count - a moment, even a split second ago is the past.. and LOVE is not there. The future has t happens yet even if it is imagined, and LOVE is not there.   When I think of something larger then myself I think of not just ME.. but everything around me.. EVERYTHING  [that has been] created. I am part of the universe and a viable part of it just because I am alive.  Ive been asking the question of 'Who am I?' Since my childhood. When I was born I just existed without thought, without shame, without aim to impress anyone... When I was happy I was at peace, when I felt pain or unhappiness I expressed it genuinely.  I did not hide my feelings. I was completely authentic.  But as I grew I discovered the world of... View full comment
VA
Vandana
Oct 27, 2018

 as i reflected on love, which is who we are at our natural core and hence the resonance of it with all things natural. I also realized that on a practical level, the two ingredienets that make love present for me are being inspired by something, someone, and feeling protected or safe in its surrounding. It is easier to resonate with love when these ingreditents are present. In their absence, a viel of sorts appears and I have to generate these ingredients from within for love to stay emerged. 

JO
Oct 25, 2018

 I understand that we are made by love, and.. love is who we are. It is not something we get, it is something we give away. It is not just a feeling.. it is much more then that.. it is what makes life worthwhile and life has no meaning unless we are sharing it (giving it away).  So.. it is love coming out of us that fulfills our purpose, and not the feelings we have that we can experience when someone else gives us attention and love.  

JP
Oct 20, 2018
Meditating daily is my topmost prority. In a meditative state I feel and experience the divine presence - Love - the realization of the integral oneness with life. It creates positive resonance in me.The apparent boundaries of divisiveness and sepatateness get dissloved. It creates an oceanic feeling of oneness. In this meditative state, the boundaries created by the divided-self melt away. Such knowing brings deep joy and bliss in me. This is the TRUTH.  When I step out of the flow of such inner connectedness, I loose the touch of the underlying oneness. Feeling seperated from others by my critical and judgemental ways of relating to others creates negative resonance in me. Awareness of this negative resonance helps me to return to the state of positive resonance. Such positive resonance creates a ripple effect.  Others are touched by this and that creates hope in me in a world that is getting more divided in many ways. I would like to cconculde my reflections by quoting Ur... View full comment
RH
Rebecca Huang Dec 5, 2018

 I really admire your priority regarding daily meditation.  It inspires me to at least try some kind of practice.  I agree that judgmental thinking can separate you from others.  Being more open and compassionate can dissolve this feeling more readily.  

The Le Gain quote is an apt reminder to appreciate others in our lives as well.  Thank you so much.

DD
Oct 19, 2018
We don't become part of something larger than ourselves, we are always part of something larger than ourselves, and  the moments we become aware of that are special moments, typically aha moments, peak moments, love moments.  An important love is how we are when realizing and appreciating our union or oneness with all that is. It may be only a momentary phenomenon particularly if awareness of our being part of something larger than ourselves is a new awareness, and it may be an ongoing love if we abide in awareness that we are part of something larger than ourselves.  I think my first peak experiences were in looking into a star-filled sky and having an awareness of how big the unvierse is and my being part of something much larger than myself.  From there I have moved to a much more frequent awareness of our being part of something much bigger and greater than ourselves, and it's an awareness that fills me with awe and love and what Barbara Frederickson calls posi... View full comment