Feel Free To Set A Better Example

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Hand-drawn art by Rupali Bhuva
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एक बेहतर उदाहरण रखने के लिए स्वतंत्र महसूस करें
- रायन हॉलीडे

कानूनी सिद्धांत के मूल में यह विचार है कि अनिवार्य रूप से स्वतंत्रता के दो रूप हैं - सकारात्मक और नकारात्मक। सकारात्मक स्वतंत्रता कुछ करने की स्वतंत्रता है, जैसे कि बोलने की स्वतंत्रता या उपासना की स्वतंत्रता। नकारात्मक स्वतंत्रता किसी चीज़ से स्वतंत्रता है, जो समझने में थोड़ी अधिक जटिल है। उदाहरण के लिए, संयुक्त राज्य अमेरिका में, संविधान का तीसरा संशोधन यह बताता है कि सरकार किसी भी निजी व्यक्ति के घर में सैनिकों को नहीं रख सकती है। चौथा संशोधन नागरिकों को अनुचित तलाशी और बरामदगी से बचाता है। जैसा कि फ्रेंक्लिन डी रोसवैल्ट ने कहा है, इच्छा और भय से मुक्ति उतनी ही महत्वपूर्ण है जितनी कि बोलने की और पूजा की।

ज़ाहिर है, इस सब का जटिल हिस्सा वह है जहाँ किसी के कुछ करने की आज़ादी, किसी और की उससे मुक्त होने की इच्छा से टकराती है।

आप अपने मन की बात कहने के लिए उठते हैं ... लेकिन वह किसी और को अपमान या चोट पहुंचा सकता है। आपको अपनी संपत्ति पर जो कुछ भी करना चाहिए, वह करने में आप को सक्षम होना चाहिए ... लेकिन धमाकेदार संगीत बजाते हुए नग्न चलना, आपके पड़ोसियों के लिए मुश्किल बनाता है। आपको अपने परिवार के लिए अपने स्वयं के चिकित्सा निर्णय लेने में सक्षम होना चाहिए ... लेकिन टीकाकरण नहीं करने का निर्णय उन सभी को प्रभावित करता है जिनसे वे मिलते हैं।

इन मुद्दों की बारीकियां राजनेताओं और वकीलों के उचित दायरे हैं, लेकिन एपिक्टेटस एक मुश्किल और कालातीत प्रश्न पूछते हैं: हमारे नियंत्रण में क्या है और क्या हमारे नियंत्रण में नहीं है?

अवांछित पात्रता और झूठे आक्रोश की इस दुनिया में, अपने रास्ते से भटकना बहुत आसान है, दूसरे लोगों पर ध्यान केंद्रित करना और उन्हें चोट पहुंचाने वाली या आपत्तिजनक चीजों को बोलने से रोकना, बजाये इसके कि हम क्या कहते हैं और कैसे अपनी प्रतिक्रिया को प्रबंधित करते हैं। हम अन्य लोगों के काम नियंत्रित करना चाहते हैं, जबकि वास्तव में, दिन के अंत में, हमारा नियंत्रण केवल स्वयं पर है।

यह हास्यास्पद है क्योंकि हमारे स्वयं के जीवन पर ध्यान केंद्रित करने के लिए बहुत कुछ है। हम किस तरह के व्यक्ति होने जा रहे हैं? हम अपनी आज़ादी के साथ क्या करने जा रहे हैं? क्या हमारे फैसले अन्य लोगों पर नकारात्मक प्रभाव डाल रहे हैं? क्या हम वास्तव में उतने ही स्वतंत्र हैं जितना हम यह सोचना चाहते हैं कि हम हैं?

और यहाँ इस सब के बारे में प्रतिवादपूर्ण बात है: मार्कस ऑरेलियस ने अन्य लोगों को प्रभावित करने और प्रेरित करने के सर्वोत्तम तरीकों के बारे में बार-बार बात की। यह बल के साथ नहीं था, लेकिन उदाहरण के साथ । यदि आप अन्य लोगों की राय और बुरे व्यवहार के अत्याचार से मुक्त होना चाहते हैं, तो बेहतर उदाहरण स्थापित करने के लिए स्वतंत्र महसूस करें।

मनन के लिए प्रश्न: आप दूसरों की आलोचना करने के विपरीत, परिवर्तन के लिए व्यक्तिगत जिम्मेदारी लेने की धारणा से कैसे सम्बद्ध हैं? क्या आप किसी ऐसे समय की व्यक्तिगत कहानी साझा कर सकते हैं, जब आप दूसरों को चोट पहुंचाने से रोकने के बजाय खुद पर ध्यान केंद्रित कर सके हैं? एक बेहतर मिसाल कायम करने में आपको क्या मदद करता है?

द डेली स्टॉइक से लिया गया अंश। रायन हॉलिडे एक अमेरिकी लेखक, विपणि और उद्यमी हैं।


Seed Questions for Reflection

How do you relate to the notion of taking personal responsibility for being the change as opposed to critiquing others? Can you share a personal story of a time you shifted the focus back to yourself instead of censuring others for being hurtful? What helps you stay rooted in setting a better example?

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12 Past Reflections
TB
Tanya Burgoyne
Mar 10, 2023
To the awakin.org owner, Your posts are always well-balanced and objective.
VL
Valencia Loya
Mar 9, 2023
To the awakin.org owner, Your posts are always well-written and easy to understand.
RG
Randi George
Feb 7, 2023
To the awakin.org administrator, Your posts are always informative and well-explained.
CS
Cortney Seaman
Feb 5, 2023
Hi awakin.org webmaster, Nice post!
AM
amy
Apr 30, 2019
The first amendment actually doesn't grant you the right to say anything you want. It just prevents the government from prosecuting you for it. It doesn't stop other people from realizing that you're ignorant and telling you that.
CA
Carol Ann Hedemark
Apr 24, 2019
There was a time when I only looked outside of myself to place blame on others for my challenges. I blamed my behaviors on my upbringing or past hurts. I justified, rationalized and lied to myself that however I lived was OK just as long as I wasn't hurting anyone but myself. After hitting a mental, physical and spiritual bottom in 2010, I became open and willing to begin the process of making changes in my life to recover from a very dark place. I woke up to the truth that the only thing I can change is myself, my attitudes, my beliefs and my behaviors. What I thought was the fault ofothers was my responsibility to change. My perception shifted and myactions began to change and my life got better.I am responsible for change. I am responsible for being in acceptance. I pray, I mediate, I try to do the next right actionand I practice being in the present moment where the truth lives. I by no means do this perfectly but I know that when I am in acceptance of life on life's terms,... View full comment
AM
Amy Apr 24, 2019
I am proud of you Carol! You sound like a very strong person! Keep sharing. It is good for you to know you are being “heard”. Yay you:)
AM
Apr 23, 2019
If I respond wrongly in any given situation, I punish myself. When God gave me (us) the 10 commandments, He didn’t do it to gift Himself ... but to actually gift me (us). In following His plan, I am free. When I am able to set my sin aside and do what He has commanded me to do, I am living Truth (in His love). When I set a bad example, (do not follow His commands), I am living falsely, (outside of Him) ... and this is a way I do NOT wish to take. I am not responsible for anyone else’s behavior but my own. It’s each one of us ... one on One with God.

“Be the change you wish to see in the world.” (Some wise person said something along this line.”
Enjoyed others comments ... FYI:)
JY
Apr 23, 2019
My story is a perfect example of Grace and Gratitude. Since my childhood i suffered from health challenges. I was fighter and kept bouncing back to live a normal life. During this process of fighting i lost my own power and started blaming and complaining about everything. My entire focus Went on what is not happening right in my life and ignoring all the good things in life , till i reached a tipping point. In year 2010 i experienced lifeand death situation , that was the turning point in my life. I realised during those moments how much blessed i was and how much i was missing the important things in life by just complaining. I learnt the magical power of Gratitude and Grace. I took responsibilty of my own life and started working towards it. I revived myself to new life by practicing Gratitude, Forgiveness and unconditional love. Today i am living an happy blessed abundant grateful life. And Whatever i learnt during the process today i pay forward by helping people To take responsi... View full comment
TY
Apr 23, 2019
I began to see my part in things as I worked the 12 steps of AA. This was about admitting my wrongs of the past, willingness to make amends and continuing to take a moral and personal inventory throughout the rest of my life! It was a game changer for me! I think the Serenity Prayer has been very beneficial in this process as well. Today, I practice keeping my side of the street clean, staying in my own lane and praying for the wisdom to know what is mine to do and what is not! Peace and Joy! Tyler D
DD
Apr 21, 2019
I very much support the notion of taking personal responsibility for being the change as opposed to critiquing others. Critiquing others, especially unasked for critiquing, doesn't help. Be the change you want to see in the world is Gandhi's message. It makes sense to me. So does the Golden Rule. Both seem to be very basic wisdom to live. I often live by the Golden Rule, being considerate, compassionate, and taking responsibility for my behavior, and usually don't censure those who aren't (except in my head, which is its own problem). What helps me stay rooted in setting a good example is knowing that I can only change me, knowing that how I am affects others, and knowing that my right action is its own reward no matter what happens.
JP
Apr 20, 2019
I take my personal responsibility for making my choices that are healthy, wise, constructive and helpful only to me but to others.It's up to me to choose what to eat or not. I may eat junk food and fill my body-mind-and heart with junk and unhealthy and toxic stuff, desires, thoughts and emotions prompting and compelling me not only me but others around me. Daily living offers me several opportunities to train my mind not to react ignorantly but wisely.Yesterday I was in a grocery store to buy fresh vegetables. The space was not wide enough for three carts to go through.Right in front of my cart, there were two ladies talking amicably with their carts parked blocking my way. I remained mindful of my thoughts and feelings arising in me. So in stead of pushing their carts angrily I took time out to put them aside so that I can move on. My intention was not to teach them a lesson or expect a "thank you expression"from them. They did it on their own. This is not a big event b... View full comment