Feel Free To Set A Better Example

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Hand-drawn art by Rupali Bhuva
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Für: 29-Apr-09
Fühle dich frei, ein gutes Beispiel zu geben
--von Ryan Holiday

Der Kern der Rechtstheorie ist die Vorstellung, dass es im Wesentlichen zwei Formen der Freiheit gibt - positive und negative. Positive Freiheit ist die Freiheit, etwas zu tun, wie die Redefreiheit oder die Religionsfreiheit. Negative Freiheit ist Freiheit von etwas, was etwas komplizierter ist. In den Vereinigten Staaten beispielsweise schreibt der dritte Verfassungszusatz vor, dass die Regierung keine Truppen in Privathaushalten unterbringen kann. Der vierte Verfassungszusatz schützt die Bürger vor unangemessenen Durchsuchungen und Beschlagnahmungen. Wie die FDR bekanntlich betonte, sind Freiheit von Not und Angst genauso wichtig wie Rede- und Religionsfreiheit.
Der komplizierte Teil all dessen ist natürlich der Punkt, an dem sich die Freiheit eines Menschen, etwas zu tun, mit dem Wunsch eines anderen Menschen, sich davon zu befreien, überschneidet.

Du darfst deine Meinung sagen ... aber das kann jemanden beleidigen oder verletzen. Du sollst in der Lage sein, auf deinem eigenen Grundstück alles zu tun, was du möchtest ... aber wenn du laute Musik hörst, ist es für deine Nachbarn schwierig, das Gleiche zu tun. Du solltest in der Lage sein, deine eigenen medizinischen Entscheidungen für deine Familie zu treffen ... aber die Entscheidung, nicht zu impfen, betrifft alle, die euch treffen.

Die Besonderheiten dieser Fragen sind das eigentliche Gebiet von Politikern und Rechtsanwälten, aber Epictetus hinterlässt eine knifflige und zeitlose Frage: Was liegt an uns und was liegt nicht an uns?

In einer Welt voller Belanglosigkeiten und Empörungen ist es einfach, sich zurückzunehmen und sich darauf zu konzentrieren, andere Menschen davon abzuhalten, verletzende oder beleidigende Dinge zu sagen, anstatt zu messen, was wir selber sagen und wie wir reagieren. Wir wollen uns in die Angelegenheiten anderer einmischen, obwohl wir uns eigentlich nur um unsere eigenen Angelegenheiten kümmern sollten.

Was lächerlich ist, weil es in unserem eigenen Leben so viel zu bewältigen gibt. Was für ein Mensch sind wir denn jetzt? Was machen wir mit unseren Freiheiten? Beeinträchtigen unsere Entscheidungen andere Menschen? Sind wir wirklich so frei, wie wir es uns vorstellen?
Und hier ist die gegensätzliche Idee von all dem: Marcus Aurelius sprach immer wieder darüber, wie man andere Menschen am besten beeinflussen und inspirieren kann: nicht mit Gewalt, sondern durch unser Beispiel. Wenn du frei sein willst von der Tyrannei der Meinungen und des schlechten Verhaltens anderer Menschen, kannst du gerne ein besseres Beispiel geben.

Auszug aus The Daily Stoic. Ryan Holiday ist ein amerikanischer Autor, Marketingexperte und Unternehmer.

Kernfragen zum Nachdenken: Wie verhältst du dich zu dem Gedanken, persönliche Verantwortung dafür zu übernehmen, dass du der Wandel bist, anstatt andere zu kritisieren? Kannst du eine persönliche Geschichte über eine Zeit erzählen, in der du den Fokus wieder auf dich selbst gelegt hast, anstatt andere dafür zu beschuldigen, verletzt zu sein? Was hilft dir, mit gutem Beispiel voran zu gehen?
Seed Questions for Reflection

How do you relate to the notion of taking personal responsibility for being the change as opposed to critiquing others? Can you share a personal story of a time you shifted the focus back to yourself instead of censuring others for being hurtful? What helps you stay rooted in setting a better example?

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Add Your Reflection

12 Past Reflections
TB
Tanya Burgoyne
Mar 10, 2023
To the awakin.org owner, Your posts are always well-balanced and objective.
VL
Valencia Loya
Mar 9, 2023
To the awakin.org owner, Your posts are always well-written and easy to understand.
RG
Randi George
Feb 7, 2023
To the awakin.org administrator, Your posts are always informative and well-explained.
CS
Cortney Seaman
Feb 5, 2023
Hi awakin.org webmaster, Nice post!
AM
amy
Apr 30, 2019
The first amendment actually doesn't grant you the right to say anything you want. It just prevents the government from prosecuting you for it. It doesn't stop other people from realizing that you're ignorant and telling you that.
CA
Carol Ann Hedemark
Apr 24, 2019
There was a time when I only looked outside of myself to place blame on others for my challenges. I blamed my behaviors on my upbringing or past hurts. I justified, rationalized and lied to myself that however I lived was OK just as long as I wasn't hurting anyone but myself. After hitting a mental, physical and spiritual bottom in 2010, I became open and willing to begin the process of making changes in my life to recover from a very dark place. I woke up to the truth that the only thing I can change is myself, my attitudes, my beliefs and my behaviors. What I thought was the fault ofothers was my responsibility to change. My perception shifted and myactions began to change and my life got better.I am responsible for change. I am responsible for being in acceptance. I pray, I mediate, I try to do the next right actionand I practice being in the present moment where the truth lives. I by no means do this perfectly but I know that when I am in acceptance of life on life's terms,... View full comment
AM
Amy Apr 24, 2019
I am proud of you Carol! You sound like a very strong person! Keep sharing. It is good for you to know you are being “heard”. Yay you:)
AM
Apr 23, 2019
If I respond wrongly in any given situation, I punish myself. When God gave me (us) the 10 commandments, He didn’t do it to gift Himself ... but to actually gift me (us). In following His plan, I am free. When I am able to set my sin aside and do what He has commanded me to do, I am living Truth (in His love). When I set a bad example, (do not follow His commands), I am living falsely, (outside of Him) ... and this is a way I do NOT wish to take. I am not responsible for anyone else’s behavior but my own. It’s each one of us ... one on One with God.

“Be the change you wish to see in the world.” (Some wise person said something along this line.”
Enjoyed others comments ... FYI:)
JY
Apr 23, 2019
My story is a perfect example of Grace and Gratitude. Since my childhood i suffered from health challenges. I was fighter and kept bouncing back to live a normal life. During this process of fighting i lost my own power and started blaming and complaining about everything. My entire focus Went on what is not happening right in my life and ignoring all the good things in life , till i reached a tipping point. In year 2010 i experienced lifeand death situation , that was the turning point in my life. I realised during those moments how much blessed i was and how much i was missing the important things in life by just complaining. I learnt the magical power of Gratitude and Grace. I took responsibilty of my own life and started working towards it. I revived myself to new life by practicing Gratitude, Forgiveness and unconditional love. Today i am living an happy blessed abundant grateful life. And Whatever i learnt during the process today i pay forward by helping people To take responsi... View full comment
TY
Apr 23, 2019
I began to see my part in things as I worked the 12 steps of AA. This was about admitting my wrongs of the past, willingness to make amends and continuing to take a moral and personal inventory throughout the rest of my life! It was a game changer for me! I think the Serenity Prayer has been very beneficial in this process as well. Today, I practice keeping my side of the street clean, staying in my own lane and praying for the wisdom to know what is mine to do and what is not! Peace and Joy! Tyler D
DD
Apr 21, 2019
I very much support the notion of taking personal responsibility for being the change as opposed to critiquing others. Critiquing others, especially unasked for critiquing, doesn't help. Be the change you want to see in the world is Gandhi's message. It makes sense to me. So does the Golden Rule. Both seem to be very basic wisdom to live. I often live by the Golden Rule, being considerate, compassionate, and taking responsibility for my behavior, and usually don't censure those who aren't (except in my head, which is its own problem). What helps me stay rooted in setting a good example is knowing that I can only change me, knowing that how I am affects others, and knowing that my right action is its own reward no matter what happens.
JP
Apr 20, 2019
I take my personal responsibility for making my choices that are healthy, wise, constructive and helpful only to me but to others.It's up to me to choose what to eat or not. I may eat junk food and fill my body-mind-and heart with junk and unhealthy and toxic stuff, desires, thoughts and emotions prompting and compelling me not only me but others around me. Daily living offers me several opportunities to train my mind not to react ignorantly but wisely.Yesterday I was in a grocery store to buy fresh vegetables. The space was not wide enough for three carts to go through.Right in front of my cart, there were two ladies talking amicably with their carts parked blocking my way. I remained mindful of my thoughts and feelings arising in me. So in stead of pushing their carts angrily I took time out to put them aside so that I can move on. My intention was not to teach them a lesson or expect a "thank you expression"from them. They did it on their own. This is not a big event b... View full comment