Softness is one of the great secrets of all spiritual practice.
When we become soft, we become like water.
We let life come to us.
We trust in its flow, and we allow ourselves to be taken in whichever direction it chooses.
This is true power because it comes from love, and love is the softest thing in the universe, and yet it is the most powerful.
When you soften your attitude to yourself, to others, and to life, you release the natural wisdom that lies within you.
Your body softens, your thoughts soften, and your heart softens.
Through softness, you find clarity and purpose without needing to force anything.
Your life becomes a gentle unfolding rather than a constant battle.
Richard Rudd is a teacher, mystic and poet.
Seed Questions for Reflection
What does softening mean to you? Can you share a personal story of a time you softened and were able to release the natural wisdom within you? What helps you gently unfold instead of being in a constant battle?
Radical Acceptance and beeing curious and kind in situations. To be soft enough to get in touch with the things as they are.
SH
Shipra
Jan 25, 2025
This is a sweet validation for me. For some weeks, I have been practicing 'No resistance and no insistence'. This is an antidote for me to fight years of conditioning of being excellent, hard-working, punctual, in control of the outcomes, efficient, productive, and whatnot. I remind myself of the river when I get stuck somewhere. The river does not resist the boulders, never does it insist. It just figures out the way, sometimes from around the boulders, sometimes taking them along, it just knows to flow. When a negative emotion grips me, I don't try to fight it out nowadays as I used to do earlier. Nor do I victimize myself, I will just be there. And wait for the emotion to get over, having some time alone helps. Softening makes me listen to the silence inside.
This really spoke to me. Busy going through my inbox, it just grabbed hold of something inside me. Spoke to me. Resonated and felt true. It pierced many of my own narratives: Diligence. Hard work. Conviction. Stick-to-itiveness. It quickly, well, "softened" me.
This is not so much a reflection but a deep sense of gratitude for Mr. Rudd's profound words regarding the softness of awareness. The disappearance of hard edges and pointy bits being the result of acceptance and abiding. Thank you Mr. Rudd.
Oh wow! the message 0f this article is synchronistically amazingly timely for me. It came in the same batch of emails with a message from a man who has been " ghosting " me for it seems over a year. My initial emotional response felt "hard" ( I guess defensive).
Now, I am beginning to pay attention to my reactiveness and return to my breathing and my
mantra of " I forgive myself, I forgive everybody and everything else" and I will take the time to "soften" more today, to allow myself to find what my heart and soul really want to say and discover what I really want from this man and more significantly what I need from this interaction. So, I am grateful for receiving Richard Rudd's article and for the other reflections I have read. Mahalo
The first thing that came to my mind was surrender. Most of my adult life was consumed with addiction. I had to surrender/softened in order to let life penetrate my soul.
When I softened my grip and let go, I naturally experienced the miracles in life.
I never realized that a life of love and compassion could be so strong yet soft..
As I have moved into senior citizen hood , and thanks also to still prevailing traditions , I often sense a softness in the response of service providers and any public person i come across and request help from.
Speaking of myself , a feeling of gratefulness and sufficiency in me helps to manifest softness towards others apart from the usual trigger of the vulnerability and innocence in the other person
RK
Rashmi Kulshreshtha
Jan 19, 2025
I believe that we human should always be helpful for each other that is the basic requirement for our country existence.
I am drawn to softness....the softness found in feathers, my dog's fur, my granddaughter's long hair that I hold as I put it into a pony tail. Softness feels respectful to me. It allows for space. When I think of softness with people, soft eyes come to mind. Eyes that see clearly and yet eyes that are kind, receptive and understanding....perhaps compassionate is the word.
I open when around softness. I open my mind, heart, and my body relaxes. As I reflect on softness, the word 'peace' comes to mind...... it's a peaceful word.
ST
streamJan 21, 2025
Mahalo Victoria from bringing both sensory and emotional connection into this reflection on softness. Reading your reflection helped me to soften a hard place in my heart.
Rudd's statement is medicine for me. For me, softness means: allowing, being at ease, comfortable with my truth and with what is, openness, acceptance of self and other and the situation, equanimity. Softness is not weak and not indifferent; softness is strong while being at ease and caring. I'm aware of still becoming more soft in general and more soft in my releasing the natural wisdom within. I have not been good at that . I'm critical. I'm a pusher and arguer. Softness may be the last attribute I consider spiritual to be developing in me, and I think it is a fundamental one. For me to be soft it seems necessary for me to be conscious of being soft, being calm, gently unfolding instead of being in a constant battle. I remind myself to be soft, and sometimes am that way. After years of attention to emotional and spiritual growth, softness is the most difficult for me to embody and be.
What helps me gently unfold is meditation and coming back to my breath. Softening to what emotions emotions come up, softening to just being there to listen to someone, softening to look at the beauty around me, softening to see beauty, pain, loss, suffering, joy, and happiness in others. It's all part of this existence. If we can alleviate suffering in someway, we must try.
The first time I had breast cancer was when I was 48. It was invasive and had spread to my lymph nodes . I had no idea of the outcome. Up until then I had a very tough and independent approach to life and challenges. I was always the care giver and helped anyone in need. What I discovered when I had cancer, that accepting help from others brought them joy. Accepting help was not a sign of weakness but came from acceptance. Being soft can be a sign of true strength. Being vulnerable is admitting being human and connects me to those around me in a deep and meaningful way.
B
BarbaraS.Jan 17, 2025
Dear Catherine, I went through breast cancer treatment as well at age 53. It truly is a humbling experience to soften and to be able to slow down, to accept help when needed, to go within and explore myself. At one point, I felt I was a shadow, disappearing and did not fear death. It was OK. I wish you well and a healthy life!
Thank you, for sharing
DD
David DoaneJan 17, 2025
Some avenues to growth can be so difficult. Congratulations that you both made the avenue so worthwhile. I sure agree that softness can be true strength. Thank you for sharing.
The passage The Softening authored by Richrd Rudd is very illuminating to me. It reminds me of the saying Simple Living And High Thinking. Our simple living can be enriching and fulfilling. Our basic needs to survive and enhance our living are very few. Sadly we are not content with what we have. We ask for more and more material things and possessions. We believe the more we have, the more merry and happy we will be. The thirst for having more possessions is rarely quenched.The more possessions we have the less we become fulfilled.
We need to be aware of this hunger and thirst for more material possessions. There is no end to this thirst.
Before I came to the US, we were relatively poor. However, we had inward richness, inner wealth of peace, joy, fulfillment and gratification.
When I came to the richest country in the world I saw inward poverty.I believe in living a balanced life. Living in a balanced way I feel happy, peaceful and fulfilled.
I believe there is light of awa... View full comment
The passage The Softening authored by Richrd Rudd is very illuminating to me. It reminds me of the saying Simple Living And High Thinking. Our simple living can be enriching and fulfilling. Our basic needs to survive and enhance our living are very few. Sadly we are not content with what we have. We ask for more and more material things and possessions. We believe the more we have, the more merry and happy we will be. The thirst for having more possessions is rarely quenched.The more possessions we have the less we become fulfilled.
We need to be aware of this hunger and thirst for more material possessions. There is no end to this thirst.
Before I came to the US, we were relatively poor. However, we had inward richness, inner wealth of peace, joy, fulfillment and gratification.
When I came to the richest country in the world I saw inward poverty.I believe in living a balanced life. Living in a balanced way I feel happy, peaceful and fulfilled.
I believe there is light of awareness within all of us. This light helps me walk on the path of natural wisdom.However, there are times when I do not remain awake and create suffering in me and others close to me. I wake up from my sleep, remain awake and walk on the path. As I am getting older, I remain more awake and walk steadily on the right path, the path of natural wisdom. May we all join each other's hands and walk on the path of awareness. This is my prayer. Amen.
Namaste.
Jagdish P Dave
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BarbaraS.Jan 21, 2025
"Inward richness", yes, I can definitely see where you would think this of the poverty of the US, inward poverty. It is a sad thing but we can hope to make a difference and set examples. "May we all join each other's hands and walk on the path of awareness." Thank you!
