One of the keys to a happier life is doing only what you want to do. We have been taught that is being selfish. That teaching comes from thousands of years of developing a domination over society. We have been taught to do things out of fear of punishment or desire for reward because that is how domination occurs. So it’s going to be a struggle to push against that ingrained teaching and start to live life from the energy of memnoon.
Memnoon is a request that blesses the one who is asked. That takes a moment to sink in. In other words what someone is requesting of me is something that I want to do, and is actually a gift to me. You are giving me a gift by asking me to do something. That’s how much I want to do it. It’s like someone said, “would you do me a favor and take the day off and do whatever you want?” Yes! [...]
The hardest thing about saying no, is telling ourselves stories about what others will say. We tell ourselves they will think less of us because we’re not doing what we’re supposed to do.
We have two choices. We can either spend some time figuring out how to see that situation in such a way that we would be coming out of the energy of memnoon, or we can give ourselves empathy that we can’t get to that spot and the best we can do is to say no.
There is something freeing in giving ourselves empathy about it. Anytime we do something because we are supposed to, we are sending out an energy that is not life affirming. We tell ourselves that if everybody said no to things they don’t want to do, no one would give to anyone. But this is the biggest lie. Our greatest need is to contribute to others.
When we give ourselves the power and freedom to only give out of memnoon we discover how joyful it can be. We want to give more and more. Imagine a little child throwing fish food into a koi pond; the joy of watching the fish swirl and pounce on the food. That’s the joy we want to have giving to others. When we can find that in any situation, the giving becomes a gift.
Excerpt from an article in Los Angeles Post Examiner.
SEED QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION: How do you relate to the framing of two choices, either coming from memnoon or giving ourselves enough empathy to say no? Can you share a personal story of a time you felt the joy of being blessed by a request? What helps you tap into your power and freedom to only give out of 'memnoon'?