We Contain Multitudes, by Chad Dickerson

CONTENEMOS MULTITUDES
por Chad Dickerson

Walt Whitman escribió una vez: "¿Me contradigo? Muy bien entonces, me contradigo (soy grande, contengo multitudes)".

Es posible ser una persona con toda una multitud de experiencias al mismo tiempo. Puedes ser un niño que acaba de salir de un barrio de chabolas con un abuelo analfabeto y una enfermedad mental disruptiva en tu familia, ir a una gran Universidad, estudiar a Shakespeare, desarrollar una carrera exitosa y finalmente ir a la ciudad de Nueva York y manejar una empresa pública como director@ ejecutiv@. De hecho, creo que nos servirían mejor si tuviéramos más personas en posiciones de liderazgo en la vida pública y privada que hayan sabido lo que es estar en bancarrota, que hayan vivido la tragedia de un abuelo que llega al final de su vida sin saber leer, que hayan conseguido ser admitid@s a una escuela de lujo y sentido que no deberían estar allí al principio, pero luego hayan profundizado y esculpido su lugar allí y en el mundo más allá.
Cualquier líder de cualquier organización de tamaño suficiente trabajará con un grupo diverso de personas y tener un conjunto diverso de experiencias solo puede ayudar a construir empatía.

En mi vida personal, me invitan a cenas de lujo y demás. A veces, al presentarse, las personas exponen sus logros profesionales y me dan ganas de conocer a la persona real, no al perfil de LinkedIn. Me pregunto: ¿Cuáles fueron tus luchas? ¿Cómo eran tus padres? ¿Cuándo te sentiste insegur@ y cómo lo superaste? ¿Cómo has llegado hasta aquí? Me doy cuenta de que nadie está obligad@ a compartir esas cosas conmigo y nunca presiono. Pero algunas de mis mejores conversaciones en ese tipo de eventos han llegado cuando he bajado la guardia y le he contado a la persona que estaba a mi lado un poco sobre mi verdadero yo, no mi perfil de LinkedIn. Muy a menudo, esa persona se abre de alguna manera. Nos reímos de la primera vez que fuimos a una cena como esta y tuvimos que descubrir cómo se usaban los cubiertos, o cómo nos sentimos cuando nos entrevistamos para nuestro primer gran trabajo en una ciudad extraña. O la persona que está a mi lado puede haberse hecho rica pero ha tenido que sufrir desafíos difíciles en la vida, de esos que la riqueza no puede enfrentar y superar. Algunas de estas conversaciones se han convertido en la base de las amistades profundas que atesoro.

Tal vez si tod@s nos damos el espacio para ser personas complejas, no reducidas a la percepción pública, nuestras biografías profesionales, nuestros perfiles de LinkedIn, las narraciones de otros sobre quiénes somos - podríamos entendernos mejor un@s a otr@s y darnos el espacio para ser desordenados pero maravillosos seres humanos.
Como escribió Whitman: Soy grande, contengo multitudes. Todos contenemos multitudes. O como George y Tammy cantaron juntos en "Two Story House": "Tengo mi historia y también la mía".
Y tú también. Todos deberíamos contar esas historias a los demás con orgullo y en toda su complejidad.

Chad Dickerson fue co-fundador y CEO de Etsy.

Preguntas semilla para la reflexión: ¿Cómo te relacionas con la noción de que contenemos multitudes? ¿Puedes compartir una historia personal de un momento en que pudiste compartir tu perfil real (no el de LinkedIn) con alguien? ¿Qué te ayuda a ofrecer espacio (para ti y para l@s demás) para ser personas complejas?

Traducido por nuestra querida voluntaria María Ayala. Este texto se leerá durante la semana en más de 100 círculos awakin por todo el mundo :). Más textos para reflexión aquí. LOVE!

Chad Dickerson was formerly the co-founder and CEO of Etsy. This post was excerpted from here.

Seed Questions for Reflection

How do you relate to the notion that we contain multitudes? Can you share a personal story from a time you were able to share your non-LinkedIn-profile self with someone? What helps you offer space (to yourself and others) to be complex people?

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Add Your Reflection

8 Past Reflections

Ronnie Dunetz

Sep 14, 2019

Lovely article! We need to let more people know us authentically far away from the "LinkedIn profile". That is one of our greatest challenges, how can we develop more compassion, appreciation and value for the varies parts of our existence!

LuAnn Cooley

Feb 7, 2019

I love this. One of my born wealthy, living the dream friends is now navigating his deep understanding of climate change and the struggle to reconcile his values with his peer group. I hear the multitudes within him in our conversations and find myself cheering on the ones who want to be different and work for a better, more equal, just and sustainable world, but know the others in him have just as strong a voice and may lead him into another, but perhaps still profound path. As odd as it sounds, I much prefer knowing the complexity of a person. :)

Feb 5, 2019

I believe we contain multitudes. we are Large. We can have space for all.

David Doane

Feb 3, 2019

We do contain multitudes, in more ways than one. We are part of one another. We share our atoms, and the atoms that are part of my body have been part of the body of every other being. Further, whatever happens to me affects others, and what happens to others affects me. And there are many aspects to me. Given my inclinations historically to be guarded, the process of sharing my non linked in profile has often started with the other being open and real with me, which has resulted in my being more open and real in return. And when I have been open and real, as happens more and more over the years, the other is more that way with me. I've learned, sometimes painfuly, that if you want the other to be real and open, be real and open. I've learned that if you want to have a friend, be a friend. What helps me offer space to be complex people is my learning that we're all complex multitudes, and that the meeting of real complex me and real complex you is what is meaningful and ful... View full comment

Jagdish P Dave

Feb 1, 2019

My life is not a straght line. It has many turns and twists. My life is not monociolor. It is muticolor. Some light, some bright, some dark, some pleasesent and some unpleasa.It a mixture of colors..My real self is not LinkedIn profile. I relate to what Walt Whitman says " I am large, I contain multitudes." When I was young I had a small circle of close friends. We got deeply connected by being vulnerable and sharing our thousands of joys and thousands of sorrows.We gave ourselves and each other room to be ourselves. All of my friends have passed way. I still feel in my heart the loving, intimate and deep relationships we had created with each other. What helps me to offer space to myself and others is finding time and opening our minds and hearts. Small and shallow talks come and go without creating depth in our relationships. Today I had invited my Jewis friend to my class to share her expereinces of practicing her faith.I have known her for the last ten years without being... View full comment

Kristin Pedemonti

Feb 1, 2019

Every one of us is more than one descriptor and so much more than our jobs. I relate to this on so many levels: as a survivor of childhood abuse and trauma, as the daughter of a father who had multiple suicide attempts and died when I was 22, as someone who grew up on the very lowest edge of middle class and ate cereal for dinner, as a former spouse of a partner with severe bi-polar/ADD and was a pathological liar, as the sister of an alchoholic brother now 26 years sober, as a former anorectic, as a Cause-Focused Storyteller who chose to sell her home and possessions to create a volunteer literacy program and had no idea what she was doing but somehow it worked out, to the 51 year old woman I am today who became a traveler collecting, presenting and performing stories worldwide and now sharing Steer Your Story across the US all the way to Alaska to provide workshops for other survivors to steer their internal narratives to be more empowered and better reflect their strength and truth of who they are today Oh yes, we contain multitudes. And when we see each other as complete human beings including our challenges and those traumas that we survived which then informed who we are today, we are so much more! I started sharing my truth publically about what it was like living with and trying to care for a parent with multiple suicide attempts. Then I spoke more on social media and in presentations about my own experience with different brain chemistry (episodic situational depression and anxiety). This vulnerability and sharing my full self resulted in others sharing their journeys too. It opened up amazing conversations with such depth. Since April 2016 I've also gone public about the childhood s*xual trauma and it peeled back another layer for others to share their stories too. And here I am on a journey all the way to Alaska in service to creating space for people to share their stories too. I am grateful. If you want to learn more, please visit: www.steeryourstory.com Hugs from my heart to yours, Kristin Hide full comment

Sidney Dekoven Feb 6, 2019

Thank you, Kristin for sharing your inspiring story. Your honesty and sincerity shines through it. Love, Sidney

Keith Roper Mar 6, 2019

Thanks so much, Kristin! My path is similar to yours: anorexic (borderline); suicidal, schizophrenic father; depression, in my case it's on-going with periodic severe dips;lowest edge of middle class (althonot *very* lowest.) Maybe our biggest difference is that I'm a male and have had to somehow own up to "manhood" with perpetual silence about my past. I'd love to talk to somebody with a similar past but they are few & far between. I'll definitely check out Steer Your Story. Thanks again!