The 'tool' that has helped me most is awareness that I am one with all that is and that all that is is sacred. That results in my becoming more accepting, less judgmental, more compassionate, and having more sense of gratitude. I'm even lightening up on myself. I like those changes in me and see them as blessings and challenges. How I center myself in the essential me that lies behind my personality is probably poorly, but I know I'm there and am in touch with that me more often in a way that I am more often comfortable with simply being me. My sense that I am one with all that is results in my more frequently seeing others as me -- we are each expressions of the one Being -- and that helps me to bless that which is different, have more compassion, and fight less. It's a slow process for me, but it is happening, and I am grateful.