bob sauerbrey wrote: "This is at the heart of being real: Forgive...why?....because there is no one to blame."
Well. That makes sense. I was actually able to do that ONCE IN MY LIFE, with a person who was so damaged and "evil" that I knew he could NOT make "right decisions." That he was ALWAYS going to "do the wrong thing." He couldn't help himself. He was "bad to the bone."
He was furious when I said that, but I was so calm at the time... I always remember this because later when he robbed me, tried to kill me, tried to get me put in jail, tried to destroy me to make him "just like me" none of it mattered. I was hurt at first, thinking he was a "friend" that I was "trying to save" when in fact I ended up learning how to "save myself." By staying AWAY from "bad people." They are the way they are.
Using Bob's analogy, just because my own parents and siblings might fall into that same category, doesn't mean I should blame them or be angry at them, I guess. They are the way they are.
Nothing and no one to blame. Damaged goods is damaged goods, and just because they are damaged doesn't mean I am too.