Our minds are such interesting places. We really do have control over how we react. I find that pausing and breathing for a moment are such a huge help. And also to step outside myself for a moment. Am I being in compassion for the other and for myself? Is this reaction justified? When I pause, usually I realize my level of reaction, in the seldom moments of intense upset, are a bit overblown. When I breathe and sit in compassion for the other and myself, that feeling of upset often dissipates and I am back to more calm. I needed this reminder recently when having a political discussion. I allowed my emotions to take over and my sense of "justice" took over too. Then I paused and just said, "we need to stop for a minute. I need to breathe." The breathing and taking a moment to step into his shoes really helped. And we were able to resume the conversation in a more healthy way. i use this when driving too which is one of the few places my anger comes out ;) and usually when there is a merge with construction and people are being selfish. Now i stop, breathe and tell myself, "have compassion, maybe they are late or someone is sick or...."" :) It is a small thing, but it helps in the bigger moments too.