I have just been dealing with the issue of helping vs sharing expertise vs fixing. I agree with the distinctions as described in the article. But what the article does not deal with the why one would feel that there is a need to help or fix. In a one on one relationship there are often subtle signals that seem to "request help" and often these signals increase in number and intensity over time. It is a 3 sided dance that generally ends badly no matter how good the original intentions are, The 3 sides are rescuer, victim and persecutor. In this dance each party plays all of the roles at one time or another. Dealing from whole understanding and trust in the rightness of the situation and the universe is the goal. So, how is this accomplished? It takes both parties to define a relationship. How do you get to the point of equality with another soul whose circumstances or presentation caught your attention because they needed something (help) without making them a victim of your rescue or eventually giving them license to label you a persecutor?
This was so close to where I am right now. Knowing that our ability to manifest our destiny - or work for change in our lives means that we must embrace change. That there is a place within toward which we are growing. Growth requires change. Our emotional response to climbing onto a step, becoming comfortable with that space and then being nudged (or kicked) to move on - for me this is where fear and hope come in - each step is the first step of The Fool in Tarot and requires the faith of a child and the steadfastness of all previous experience. The comfort of the current known situtation is the most prevalent quality of our western society - a belief that change can be stopped - that what you see today is how it will always be - a denial of change - fear. Regardless of campaign slogans - Change of direction is a source of great fear. Fear is a great manifestor and attractor - so truly, we personally and as a country have nothing to fear but fear itself.
History, circumspect thought, faith, patience and solid goals are the best quellers of fear - do not forget to enjoy the journey for it is truly amazing.