Love, loving is embedded in all living things , human included. In the animals when we find this trait we simply say that they are programmed by nature. But the same thing is there in the human beings too. Programmed. Yet the Freewill that we possess makes that think that we can control everything. " I will love if I like. I will love if I want. " the moment this "I" takes over love is no longer in its pure form. It is contaminated .
So, I think, that to feel love and to feel loved back the "I" should recede in the back ground . This is where an understanding Self Knowledge would help.
Simple and yet profound. I have a related observation to make. As I search in the outside word without knowing what I am searching for , I am generally joined by a few others who, I think, will help me in my search. In the process I am taken far far away from my original search though that itself was unclear to me. It dawns on me that I am the only one who knows what I am searching for and I am the only one who can identify it when my search ends in success.