Gee..........I wonder if all the folks in Kentucky and elsewhere who've lost their homes, pets, stuff, and even family members to the tornadoes this past week can feel all this abundance of love coming from a great tree or noble others. I'm too jaded for this woo-woo stuff and prefer to deal with real life happenings as I pray for these heart-breaking humans who have lost so much. I'm outta here.
I do believe that there are evil people indeed. People who purposefully kill their children, rape and hurt the innocent, cruelly torture animals....these to me are some examples of wothless individuals and should not be given excuses for their horrible acts of torture and death. Sorry not sorry for feeling this way. I won't find excuses for the Nazis who imprisoned my father in Auschwitz and murdered his sister and mother. These are not nice people who do bad things but evil worthless scum. No wonder our country is weakened by such stupid thoughts. I have zero compassion for evil assholes.
I like the validation that you exude to the reader of your comment, Kristin. It's permission of a sort to actually treat ones self nicer, better, and as a result, the consequences are rewarding to the fullest.
I have learned and continue learning to take nothing and no one for granted. When one forgets to appreciate all that life gives us, then one will settle into complacency, routine, boredom and just take people and things for granted. This is suicide for relationships and when it's happened to me where the other person fell into this complacency, I didn't have the power to awaken them so I'd leave. I'd rather be alone than lonely with another. I finally found someone who is awakened to what's important in life and it's a miracle that I never stop feeling gratitude for.
Thank you for your post as it was what I needed to read at this time in my life. I have recently gotten involved in a new relationship with a delightfully enlightened man and find it hard to get used to the idea that he finds me so beautiful. I'm turning 60 in a few months and have been mourning the way that I used to look just 20 yrs ago, but aware that should I live to be in my 80s and beyond, I may be looking back at how I looked at 60 and finding myself beautiful 'then'. But with age comes wisdom (it's obvious in your post) and I'm thinking by then it won't matter how I look and will actually find how I look then as a different kind of beauty. Intellectually I realize that looks really don't matter, so whatever longing I have for my past looks is superficial and doesn't offer me anything positive. Your post has been a real eye-opener and for that I am grateful.
For me, if the love between myself and another feels uneven, that is, if I feel as if I'm giving more than I receive, I feel taken advantage of. I've adapted to the others in my life until I've established some sort of pattern and unhealthy molding of my being to accept this unevenness, this unbalance. It's not that I expect the other to to love exactly as I do ('The 5 Love Languages' goes into the differences), but it's more of this observation that I am being taken for granted. I wonder if this feeling of unfulfillment I experience is something I need to just accept and live with it realizing that the other won't or can't love me 'more' or if I just need to not settle and find someone else who can fulfill this 'need' or desire in me to be loved in a more balanced way.
I love what you wrote, Abhishek. So true! Sometimes I feel as if I'm a bit obsessed with death as I've had quite a few loved ones die in the past few years. I think of my own and am in some ways 'preparing' for that. Yet I don't allow that to overshadow the graditude I feel throughout the day as I purposefully seek out the beauty and wonder that life offers. Thanks for your wise perspective.
I live and work in a big city and I deal with the public doing retail which can be so stressful at times especially during the holidaze. That and the fact that my sister recently passed away. I allow myself to grieve and when I can, during breaks at work, I'll sit outside with my face towards the sun (which we have during winter) and just absorb the warmth of it for a while. A sense of peace, calm, and comfort engulfs me as it feels so healing. I try to hang on to that feeling as long as I can as it helps me during the stressful times. Nature is so much bigger than our own problems so for me, to indulge in it's myriad ways of beauty whether it's the sun or rain or birds flying in waves of grace and beauty..........or even observing the wild cats who own the neighborhood as they go through the dynamics of their hierarchies.....it's all grist for the mill in my being grateful for life.
I just turned 58 and like the wonderment of a child, I still get excited to get on a plane and fly. I have to sit by the window always and am still in such awe trying to comprehend how this big heavy plane can be up in the air! And that there's only a few feet of metal and whatnot between me and the space below. Sunrises and sunsets still amaze me as do spider webs, birds feeding their young, lightning, and the destruction of wind and rain and other natural occurrences. I give thanks often from the heart. Being grateful for just being alive (even during the times it sucks) is something I am daily.
I spend two days a month holding hands at a clinic for women/girls who are going through abortions. I wipe their tears and I love each and every one of them. They often thank me but it is me who is grateful to them for allowing me to be there to comfort them during this emotional/physical trying time in their lives. What I get out of this is the pure balance I need in life as I work in retail which has it's own 'sufferings' to deal with.
It's easy to get caught up in the junk of everyday obligations (work, family, friends, social media etc) because one can't or shouldn't ignore these things and simply sit and think for 24-7 in quietness. But there is a way to be mindful of what you're doing 24-7 and remind oneself to stop here and there for a minute (or an hour or two if you can spare it) to just stop rushing about and just Be. It is possible. It takes self discipline and awareness to just Be. But I find that I can connect with myself and others simply by being conscious of the present, by listening, by choosing my words, and just soaking in the presence of another. I can do this in person, online, on the phone, and even via my thoughts.
Smita...........thank you for the reminder. I needed that. It's as if instead of merely experiencing the suffering and 'enjoying' the pity party, simultaneously one can observe oneself outside of her/his self. Doing this puts things into a different perspective and for me, will also connect me to others that suffer without feeling too self-centered about it all. Robert Frost said, "the best way out is always through" and I've taken that to heart so I don't need to find escape by drowning my sorrows in booze/drugs. And speaking of Anais Nin.......I've had this quote of hers attached to all my emails for years: "We don't see things as they are, we see things as we are." Thanks for your words this morning.
I often think about how different every individual's pace to life is.....how fas/slowt they walk somewhere, eat a meal, read a book, how much time they need to sleep or do whatever activities. Ideally, with one's significant other, it's nice when the paces of one another can match somewhat or be in sync, but that doesn't always happen and I wonder if that is a criteria for a better relationship, or if we just need to accept each others unique pace.
Well said and so true. Only God is perfect. I don't even use the word 'perfect', but use 'ideal' instead. I don't strive for perfection, but I strive to do the very best that I know I'm capable of doing.
Amy, I can totally relate to what you wrote about imperfection. Even as a kid, when given a choice of say, getting a stuffed animal toy, I'd always go for the imperfect one as I felt that it needed more love, the love that I could give it. To this day, I see beauty in the imperfect and that goes for people's faces......crooked teeth, scars, moles, whatever as that just feels more real to me, more authentic, all that shows the story of who one is.
I love what you wrote. The words 'insecure bliss' is what really stood out and make me squirm in my seat as it gave me at first this discomfort, then as I re-read it a few times, I got this realization of what you meant by it. There's a freedom to experiencing this concept of 'insecure bliss' that makes perfect sense and I want to explore it further. Thanks for that 'food for thought' as I'll be contemplating it throughout my day.