Reader comment on Kate Murphy's passage ...

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    On Apr 17, 2020 David Doane wrote:

    We are one, inseparably interrelated, so of course we are part of one another's story, if we want to be or not. The choice we have is how we are part of it. To be willing to listen, to truly pay attention and listen and be a positive part of another's story, is an expression of love. I often overcome closeness-communication bias and listen to what's being said -- I've learned to. What's helped me includes: having a wife who starting years ago says, "I have something I want you to hear, I want your undivided attention, is this a good time?" Also, I've learned that the present is all I've got, so I've gotten fairly good at being present and listening. Also, I believe in having a beginner's mind, I enjoy discovery and learning, I know listening is a good way to learn, so I at least sometimes listen and learn. Also, I don't know what the other has to say, I want to hear what the other has to say, so I've gotten fairly good at listening to him or her and not just listen to my own thinking, predictions, or prejudices.

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    On Apr 21, 2020 Khuyen Nguyen wrote:

    "It resonates me that we are part of one another's story" I had a lesson learnt about this experience while I listened to my partner. He talked about the frustration in our relationship, I unconsciously felt the pressure to solve the problem so I offered the solutions. It came to nowhere because both of us got even more frustrated.

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