Reader comment on Ajahn Brahm's passage ...

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    On Mar 15, 2015 david doane wrote:

    Things often don't go how we want.  Things that don't go how we want we tend to call "wrong."  We'd be better off calling them life.  Things go how they go.  That's life.  I can't control outcome.  I can behave impeccably, or at least strive to, and hope for the best, knowing there are no guarantees and things often don't go as wanted.  My mantra for a long time has been process, not outcome, a reminder to focus on good process of communicating and behaving and not focus on trying to make a certain outcome happen.   By becoming more mindful, that is, by observing nonjudgmentally, we become more accepting and less controlling, more aligned with life rather than fighting with life.  I've grown a little bit in that way.  I think you develop the strength to become an observer when things go wrong by practicing being an observer always, so that the practice is in place when things don't go as you would like.  What has helped me is deepening the  awareness that my responsibility is to behave impeccably, not to try to control outcome.  The ancient Greeks said our labor is our own, the product belongs to the gods. 

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