Reader comment on Michael Lerner, PhD's passage ...

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    On Feb 1, 2015 david doane wrote:

    Curing not only implies that something is being done to me from outside, it also implies that whatever was wrong is completely gone and done, while healing means the process of becoming more whole is from inside and is an ongoing process.  For me, reconciling equanimity with allowing feelings to come up means to allow and accept feelings that are occurring without being dominated or controlled by them.  I can see over the top of them and maintain equanimity, which is sometimes very difficult to do.  I haven't had life threatening illness, but a day or two after having a knee replacement, I was laying in my bed in great pain and feeling very sick, and I could hear people downstairs talking and laughing, and though I knew what I was going through was temporary, I had thoughts and fantasies of this is what it would be like to be dying, alone on my death bed, which fantasies were actually insightful and helped nurture a sense of rebirth and gratitude as I began to feel better.  What helps me live with the ongoing stresses in a way that I continue to feel whole is for me to know that I am bigger than my stresses.  I can have a detachment from them.  It helps me to remind myself that I don't have to be taken over by the stresses and I can learn and grow and become more whole from them.

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