Reader comment on Rachel Naomi Remen's passage ...

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    On Mar 16, 2013 Edith Lak wrote:

    This is a great piece, true to self and so interesting. The first thing that popped into my mind was ‘Yes’ and the old adage of; ‘If you help someone, it will come back to you three fold’..  But serving is so so very different from helping – massively.  When I was young I was told to be weary of helping others, when I grew, I was told to help others and good will come back, now as I am coming into my own I realise that everything I do has a reaction, be it a good reaction or a bad one but never-the less  a reaction either way, and that stirs reactions within the me-self,  mainly because the word ‘charity’ has to be defined in my actions also, as most of actions and  reactions can be driven from lower self, ego and vanity by wanting self rewards and wanting them quickly, cause the more you help/give the more you get back – right :-)  Wrong… It wasn’t too long a couple of years ago, that I saw a man in a wheel chair go nuts at a person trying t help him cross the street, the man in the wheel chair started yelling at a young man who tried to push him across the road when the lights had changed to red, you could see the young man genuinely want to help the disabled man, but it turned, the disabled man yelled and went nuts at the young man, the young man got angry and kicked the wheel of the chair and huffed off, When the people yelled out are you okay to the disabled man, he said ‘yes’, I appreciate the wanting to help, but he should have stopped and asked me first instead of just thinking it’s okay to help me, I just had my chair fixed and it is different now, I need to push harder on the wheel for turning, but if he would have helped me, I’m sure my fingers would have got caught in the spokes. I looked, I saw and I went ahh, I see. Only if the young man would have stayed around to hear this, he wouldn’t have got upset and would have learned that wheelchairs get serviced too, and, sometimes with problems. I saw what had happened and understood that , but it wasn’t  until I was away from home, in India, and I was giving seva-service, when something in me noticed a smile, and that’s all there was, just a smile, but the smile was of true happiness , I truly noticed the difference between helping and serving, where serving has no reward base to it and it has no repayments attached to it, nothing other than a smile, when serving there is no head chatter and no time attached to it , yes  I noticed I was serving and smiling, where-as before helping  others in different areas of whatever  was a chore with wanting a repayment of  the said dues in life returned, even though I didn’t say that to self, that’s what the internal programmed dialogue was – If I give, or If I’m seen to be giving - I get..  Expectation, our expectations of what we think we deserve back from life, and from others, from what we think we put into it, come from our own wants and needs to be seen as giving.   Awesome Reflective Piece..  xox

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