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We just celebrated our 50th anniversary. it took me quite a while to fully appreciate the wisdom of this advice.

Such a beautiful story. Touches my heart

How beautiful. I have never heard it expressed quite like that. Tht

Hi Ravi, I love your writings. Here's a present for you - a little story I just wrote. Hope you and others enjoy it. Hiring Nelson Twenty years ago, I oversaw a 60-person operations center for a national real estate appraisal management company. We had many customer service reps (CSR) whose job was to do their best to resolve whatever issues came their way. We were hiring and Nelson was one of the candidates. The encounter was so unusual that it still affects me to this day. Nelson had recently arrived from Nigeria to make his way, and hopefully his fortune in America. He had also planned to return to Nigeria someday, his true home. He was in his late twenties, very handsome (more about this in a moment) and had the full measure of immigrant spark. Although he spoke English quite well, he had a thick accent and was somewhat difficult to understand. Since the CSR work was almost exclusively through the telephone, it was important that the customers would understand him. Reading his resume, I discovered that he was getting by (almost) by being a model for men’s clothing, but I did not see his home address. It turned out that he had a job as the night shift person in a residential home for special needs adults. He could often get a few hours sleep and still manage to help the residents when needed. Marvelous, I thought. Here is this young man, this right age to be my son, arriving in a foreign country and, somehow, managing. But even more remarkable was that I experienced how the “winds of the universe” had blown us together for this moment. Something opened in me. An energy filled with kindness and generosity was palpable, I knew my own history was filled with odd coincidences that brought me here. And Nelson’s story, no doubt, was even more convoluted. And yet, here we were. He needing a job and I having the possibility of giving him one. We talked for a while and I discovered he was engaged to a woman in Nigeria. His plan was to marry her in Nigeria, ... [View Full Comment] Hi Ravi, I love your writings. Here's a present for you - a little story I just wrote. Hope you and others enjoy it. Hiring Nelson Twenty years ago, I oversaw a 60-person operations center for a national real estate appraisal management company. We had many customer service reps (CSR) whose job was to do their best to resolve whatever issues came their way. We were hiring and Nelson was one of the candidates. The encounter was so unusual that it still affects me to this day. Nelson had recently arrived from Nigeria to make his way, and hopefully his fortune in America. He had also planned to return to Nigeria someday, his true home. He was in his late twenties, very handsome (more about this in a moment) and had the full measure of immigrant spark. Although he spoke English quite well, he had a thick accent and was somewhat difficult to understand. Since the CSR work was almost exclusively through the telephone, it was important that the customers would understand him. Reading his resume, I discovered that he was getting by (almost) by being a model for men’s clothing, but I did not see his home address. It turned out that he had a job as the night shift person in a residential home for special needs adults. He could often get a few hours sleep and still manage to help the residents when needed. Marvelous, I thought. Here is this young man, this right age to be my son, arriving in a foreign country and, somehow, managing. But even more remarkable was that I experienced how the “winds of the universe” had blown us together for this moment. Something opened in me. An energy filled with kindness and generosity was palpable, I knew my own history was filled with odd coincidences that brought me here. And Nelson’s story, no doubt, was even more convoluted. And yet, here we were. He needing a job and I having the possibility of giving him one. We talked for a while and I discovered he was engaged to a woman in Nigeria. His plan was to marry her in Nigeria, then bring her to the U.S, have some children and return to Nigeria. How he would accomplish this feat was unknown, but he would use his wits and hopefully, it would all work out. What a spirit! Although some members on our team were concerned about Nelson’s accent, he was so charming and positive that I had a reasonable hope it would work out. In fact, it did and he received many compliments from his team members and our customers. About a year later, when I was thinking of promoting him, he informed me that he had started a side gig in the health care field that he hoped would blossom into his own full-time business. Soon after that, he told me he was planning to move to Atlanta to grow his new business. We worked out a most agreeable departure plan including a big party for him. We have kept in touch (Facebook) all these years. He now lives in Nigeria with his wife and 4 children. I feel lucky to have been a tiny part of his journey. As I was deciding whether to write this story last week, I was coming home from the “Y.” My route home is on a beautiful winding country road with a large farm on one side and horse paddocks on the other side. It was sunny and brisk. A red-tailed hawk flew over my car and stayed with me for a long while, finally flying off. It felt quite personal as his red tail reflected the sunlight. Thus, my question of whether to write this was answered. [Hide Full Comment]

It is true as far as it goes. But it does not go far enough. And I think that that is a good thing to think about.

I like the mantra "this is actually happening right now"

As a mediator I have become highly sensitive to the mood a simple change in even one word changes the experience. For example change might for must or even change a question mark for a period and the response is quite different. One tends to open and the the other to shut.

Right on brother. Living with lots of animals helps. They are wondrous beings

How beautiful . As for practice, every morning, I walk our dogs.

It has gotten easier as I have become older. I live an ordinary life. And yet, mystery pervades.

What a wonderful presentation. I have been been working on breathing through my nose. How simple yet I often forget. It makes life very liquid

I am a mediator and the nicest "compliment" I can get is "you did not do anything. We hardly needed you". I became invisible.