On Mar 16, 2011 Rambo wrote:|
@catherine Stand up and fight for yourself when you need to but then move on emotionally and mentally without harbouring any resentment. This is obviously difficult to do in practice but it can be done and is probably the only way you can stay sane within such an environment. If you don't feel like you can stand up for yourself then you need to build the inner strength and courage to do so. Courage means to act in spite of your fear and building it is just like building a muscle - it requires practice. And don't give up until you get there. As a sage once said, defeat the defeatist within you.
On Mar 11, 2011 Rambo wrote:|
@Catherine I agree with you in that if all you're getting from them is "bombs" then you need to stand up for yourself.
If we're not strong inside then saying that we forgive other people is pointless because we would never have been able to oppose them more forcefully anyway.
But what you don't want to do is to dwell on the pain inflicted upon you by others or to dwell on their deficiencies. And this is where forgiveness comes in play. So even when you resist them and fight back you carry the understanding that whatever negativity they are expressing is a result of even deeper pain and dissatisfaction they have within themselves which has nothing to do with you.
Thus, you do what you need to do keep your peace but you have no need to hate them or dwell on what they do/did to you because they are suffering even more than you are. And if you can look at it this way then you will find that it no longer affects you. You act in the moment and then move on.
On Dec 15, 2010 Rambo wrote:|
This post is very interesting. I think part of the reason for my normal "hording" mentality is that I am trying in some way to further deepen my own status, existence or sense of completeness through feeling that the given item or person is mine and no one elses. I am identified with my thoughts and emotions, thinking that they and they alone define me. Sharing what I have with others requires me to let go of this identification, if even just a little, otherwise I won't really be sharing without expecting something back. It's only when I share without expecting return that I will actually get the feeling of joy that the post mentions.