All Comments By Shyam

Smile. How we smile and the other person smiles back to us. No articulation , just a silent acknowledgement of beingness. I remember whenever I am in the park , for a morning walk , and sometimes in a pensive mood, and suddenly we exchange smiles , and the entire pensive mood vanishes and life starts appearing wonderful and joyous again. Suddenly a flower , that was falling off the tree , falls near me or over me , and I feel divinely blessed. Oh , how beautiful everything is

The Serbian saying "Be humble for you are made of earth. Be noble for you are made of stars". So profound.

Learning to go with the flow of life, without resistance, is the key , I guess. Laotzu .s instructions are so meaningful. its about internalising what we see rather than discussing about we see.

Do remember a pilgrimage where all the pilgrims are usually saints . I had undertaken it just to experience the grace of God. I had seen saints and would try and be like them. What I realised was, the authenticity and the natural flow of love was not there. Then I stopped trying and In a simple way started being in love , in gratitude of everything received, in awe of the gifts nature was bestowing upon me, the realisation of what nature and my life was trying to teach , and then I could sense a natural change happening within me.

Thankyou for the poetic reply.

Am reminded of a quote " When your fear touches someone's pain, it becomes pity, when your love touches someone's pain, it become compassion. Stephen Levine Pity, sympathy and empathy are all touching on other's pain. Sometimes we do this for ourselves and the question of "Why me " . or " how life can be so cruel " , "what do I do wrong " arise and trouble us more than the actual pain /sorrow being felt. We suffer, other's suffer too. Seeing it with love and as a larger game plan , makes us more compassionate towards others as well as ourselves. So true , when the author says Compassion is not a response to sorrow or suffering but can be practiced as a way of life.

That reminds me why it is a good practice to sit and settle down for a while, before sitting in meditation. It is always good to ground ourselves , before we close our eyes for meditation. Mark Nepo mentions the journey of becoming who we were born to be. Its an endless journey and a life long practice and we do not reach anywhere, we just grow. What is required is just embracing life in its entiriety . The inner transformation which happens when we just " do good and be good" , live a life based on values. do not get carried away what others think of us, living a life base don love and service is all that sees us through in this journey.

Dear Chelsea, sending you love and positive energies. Wayne Dyer ,says in the last para, that we have to remember the divinity within us. By forgiving the wrong doings, from the inner part of us, we not only free ourselves of the memories, we also fill up hearts with love , for ourselves, as well as the other.

Forgiveness, although such an easy and good thing to do , is seldom done from the heart. We may choose to ignore the wrong act and move on, but forgiving someone from the heart , is rarely done. The pain and the feeling of hatred remains stored within. Its a challenge to throw out the feelings of hatred in even very simple wrongdoings. Have learnt that the outer reflects the inner, but if in the inner we have hatred stored, how will be able to emit love . We can only give out what we have , and for us to radiate love ,we must be full of this love and one of the ways of doing that is to adopt forgiveness for any small or major injustices we may have suffered.

I have recently been volunteering at a Hospice, Shanti Avedna. . I go there once a week and sit with them , play with them or just smile at them. During my last six months , many have passed away. I remember , I was very close to one Ramu Sharma , whom I had also gifted a phone . I got a message that he was not well and almost at the end of his life. Sat with him just holding his hand. The hands were almost lifeless and no reaction. Every five to ten minutes I could feel him squeezing my hand, Whether it was my imagination or he was really doing that I don't know. Would have loved to stay more but I was entrusted with the task of contacting his ' so called " family ( he had absolutely no one) . He died the next day. I don't know what would have made a difference in his life. Gifting him a phone. Almost being his best buddy. Sitting with him and talking with him during my visits. Holding his hand on the last day . But yes , as Deborah says in the passage, I was, and still am grateful for the experiences.

Finding bliss in a simple realisation of being aware of the twirling of hair and choosing not to do is amazing. Like the author says , it's about practicing. Thankyou for sharing. Finding joy in dancing with the spirit of your son sucha beautiful practice to. I also re-live many memories conversing with my wife who passed away almost ten years ago. There is a o much of joy in it.

Enlightenment or something a kin to that, is the absence of craving for pleasure and the absence of running away from pain. No seeking , no goals, just being our true selves. As Brother David puts it. " Ask nothing ,refuse nothing. What is , is. Nothing else I want, just what is ". One realisation. When I am typing this I realise or question how will I sound or appear. If someone appreciates I will feel good. If someone ignores or disagrees I will feel bad. This is what prevents us from living our true lives as per the author.

Sometimes life hurts us, causes us pain. Rather than accepting it as nature's way of doing things, we start blaming others or even ourselves. In this manner , apart from the physical pain or emotional pain that might have been caused, we add more pain by attributing the pain to someone else, even God , even ourselves , and attract much more suffering , which is much higher than the pain would have caused us. It is observed that even gold has to go undera lot of stress ( fire) to be purified. Can we just take any stressful event this way and treat it and even welcome it , as our own purification process.

We are generally unsatisfied with our lives. We are continuously seeking a satisfaction outside of us . We feel we need to become something to feel more satisfied. In the process we have a feeling of lacking something. Not understanding and realising that all the satisfaction is already within us. We have what is needed by us. We need to tap into our inner view . We have to find the contentment with our inner self. All the joy and happiness is contained there. Many times during our meditation there is this realization of complete contentment and an experience of being fully satisfied with our selves. When we are rooted in our inner view , that feeling of contentment stays with us.

I am usually nice . sometimes I am not even nice. But rarely kind as per the author Donna. When I introspect , I see that why I am nice is because it makes me feel good. It increase my dopamine levels when I smile at someone and the person smiles back. When I give a material gift to someone I feel good. But the point I wish to ponder (after reading and rereading this passage ) is why I am Nice. Is my goal only feeling good. Can I not strive for a state which is higher than just feeling good. Can I not be so involved with the giving that it becomes a habit and I do it even when it may or not necessarily make me feel good. Can the giving be done in such a way that the giving and the receiving becomes secondary and what matters is just the dance of joy .

Although Carrie had written this with a different context, I see it resonate with some issues facing some relationships, wherein we allow ourselves to be used , ignoring the infringements in the beginning till a time wherein it becomes imperative to take the time out and take up the messy work of healing the relationship. Many times just in order that we do not shake up the status quo , we allow small misbeahaviours or small troubles not to come up to the surface. They are brushed underneath the Cupboard and they lie there. One day we are not able to take it any more and we are forced to take up the issues and resolve them, which maybe messy or like opening up the wall, and a big relook into the whole aspect. We are forced to come out of our comfort zone and begin the messy work of mending or tending to what is the real problem.

Yes, sometimes there are no clear answers to a question. While going undergoing a training in palliative care counselling, i was told there will be a question frequently asked , "Why me " ? And the answer to it would generally be "I dont know ". But in order to nudge the questioner go deeper , we need to help him to explore his inner in a deeper way and answer the question himself by keeping on the conversation which may lead to the answering of the question by himself .

Cultivation of deep empathy would mean , understanding the point of view of another, his deeper feelings, the reason behind his way of thinking. Sometime s we judge another person based on superficial knowledge and then start casting aspirations, which in turn makes the other person do the same and that results in all round hatred , and very bad relations between people , not only others but our close ones too. Although , it may not be fully related , but I used to run away seeing other's pain and suffering. If I knew someone had passed away in a house I would go there after 2-3 days so that i do not have to witness the deep pain and grief felt by the people at the time of the initial news of a closed one passing away. I would close my eyes if someones wound came in my sight , even in pictures. Through some introspection and inner cultivation I have changed my way of looking at pain. I could see I was fearful the pain would engulf me and make me feel feel miserable. After long introspection and redefining my values I have come to a realisation that it would actually give me joy If i could alleviate the pain and suffering of someone. Now I do not run away from pain but go closer to it , feel it and try and offer some comfort to the sufferer. My not running away from pain has helped me to see the world in all its hues.

Thankyou for sharing this profound truth. Everywhere we seek this ego fuel and it limits our ability to serve unconditionally , to love unconditionally

Thankyou for the kind words. Also reminds me a quote a friend shares." Bloom where you are planted "

Am reminded of a quote , " Nothing can affect us, unless we allow it to do so ". As long as we are able to find the true meaning of our being on this planet, which is akin to a flowers's job to bloom, there is nothing which should affect our happiness. The moment we start seeking appreciation, recognition of our efforts, being appreciated by others, our joy and happiness in just blossomimg like a flower , gets compromised. It falls in other's hands. Remember a personal story. We started a group wherein we were providing ration and medicines during the onset of Covid. Some newspapers covered the story and surprisingly it highlighted just a few of the persons in the group who were otherwise well known and connected. My family told me , you are doing so much but your name does not appear anywhere. I did not comment or do anything about it. To me it did not matter. My ' job" was to serve the needy and that I was doing. The joy and happiness in doing my bit was all I needed. But I know , it was tough for the family to understand.

when we do small acts of kindness, regularly and more out of a habit rather than to prove , achieve or gain anything, they help us open up the blockages in our heart. Picking up earthworms from the walking track and putting them on one side with love, picking up mu dog's poop with love, cleaning up hair from wash basins, visiting end of life care patients who because of poverty sometimes have smelly wounds, helping dressing the horrific cancer wounds etc, are simple acts which help us clear our heart's blockages.

when we do small acts of kindness, regularly and more out of a habit rather than to prove , achieve or gain anything, they help us open up the blockages in our heart. Picking up earthworms from the walking track and putting them on one side with love, picking up mu dog's poop with love, cleaning up hair from wash basins, visiting end of life care patients who because of poverty sometimes have smelly wounds, helping dressing the horrific cancer wounds etc, are simple acts which help us clear our heart's blockages.

I have witnessed this wonder when walking without a destination, without any agenda. When we walk fir an agenda , the purpose or the destination blinds us to the wonders and amazing sights during the journey. Slowing down , spending quality time on the way , reveals so many hidden truths, both outside and inside of our selves.

"We are in relationship all the time, and our relationships are a reflection of our own inner world. ". To learn and to grow, you need relationships. " So aptly said. Where we falter is when our ego starts telling us you are better than XYZ. You deserve to be treated better. We start viewing the relationship as a combat and start devising ways to prove we are better . We even manipulate just to show ourselves in "better than "ways. The very relationships which were meant to give us joy , starts giving us stress and result in a never ending struggle.

What I have found is Faith is an internal trait and gets formed after being personally experienced . It is a confidence in the strength of the laws of nature . Belief is the external trait or something which has been told to us though our elders or through our religious texts. During corona , we had formed a group wherein we started reading Vinoba texts . The texts were so inspiring and our knowledge started improving. The turning point came ( It is still continuing) when we actually started internalising the values and even started trying and living upto those values. Sometimes our prior knowledge or a belief in something actually prevents us from going deeper and exploring it further. If we can rise above our beliefs and get into the depth of what is actually being said and then actually experience it and after that internalize them . that would lead to an unwavering faith

What I have found is Faith is an internal trait which has been personally experienced or a confidence in the strength of the laws of nature . Belief is the external trait or something which has been told to us though our elders or through our religious texts. During corona , we had formed a group wherein we started reading Vinoba texts . The texts were so inspiring and our knowledge started improving. The turning point came ( It is still continuing) when we actually started internalising the values and even started trying and living upto those values. Sometimes our prior knowledge or a belief in something actually prevents us from going deeper and exploring it further. If we can rise above our beliefs and get into the depth of what is actually being said and then actually experience it and after that internalize them .

To "Die Empty " is to die with no regrets of unfulfilled agenda, with no pending plans. This is possible when , after careful and deep evaluation , wehave arrived at our main purpose in life and when wehave fully spent all my energy, time and focus in that pursuit.
It is our inner self, our intuition, out gut feeling, which keeps on guiding us. We just need to quieten ourselves and listen to it and then pursue it whole heartedly.

How Can I live in the present , in a way that I live my true authentic self, no pretenses or people pleasing efforts.. My work, My love, My Time , My face. Slowly and intensely growing like a plant and dying as graciously as a ripened fruit, fertile, detached and after having lived a life well spent.

Yes, so true. We only find what we seek.

We find what we seek. If we are concentrating on the negativity , we are sure to encounter that and if we are concentratingon positivity we are again sure to encounter that too. It is up to us , what we train our minds to do.
When we are deeply focussed on shortcomings of a person or a thing , our mind conveniently misses the goodness in the person or the beauty of the object.
I remember going on a trek. It was a beautiful place . However we started concentrating on how bad the roads were , how difficult the trek was, poor facilities and we were finding no joy in the trek . Someone pointed out that there was so much beauty around , which we were missing and the moment we started concentrating and appreciating the beauty around we almost forgot about the difficultiesof the trek.
By being mindful of our thought process, we can train our mind into positive sid eof things and making it focus on them.
We will find what we seek. We just need to be mindful what we are seeking.

It is true that if we give food to someone , it may not really matter to him whether we are giving food to him with love or just to satisfy our ego. Then the question would come is why are we giving food to another . Are we feeding the poor to satisfy our ego or are we serving a less privileged person with food , just as a calling of our inner self to share the goodness we have received and express gratitude for the privileges we have received in life.
The same activity of serving food , when done with love, will definetelygive afeeling of being wanted and respected to the other and at the same time will lead to a true satisfaction and a resultant inner transformation in us,

Being before doing . How can we start an activity after ensuring the inclusion of love component in the activity. Many times we begin some service activity with good intention and if it is for any other reason apart from love , it is bound to create an unease or negative impression on the recipient
Like it is said , we may feed the hungry or give water to the poor but if not done with love or in the spirit of wishing whole hearted well being of other, then it is of no use.
How to ensure that whatever we do comes out of a space of love.
How can we internalize love, be awakened enough that whatever we do comes out of space of love.

Even before we actually meet another person ,we form a mental perception of that person , which may be based on theirexternal appearanceand it is most of the time coloredwith our prejudicesand is also based on what movie is playing, in our head, at that time . Our perception about others also gets affected whether we see them from a space of fear or whether we see from a space of love.
This happens throughout the day as we are caught up in our movie "about me " all the time. We are constanly thinking about our past and what we are going to do next.
Meditation or chanting helps us in breaking that pattern and makes us calm . This calmnessbrings us back to the present moment and and with this awareness t we can meet another person without our prejudices and we would be able to see the other person, as to who he actually is, rather than our projection about him. In the calm and aware state we can see the real " him".

Beautiful poem, sir. I guess we need ti sit peacefully, fully with our innerself, then only grms like these would appear.

We all want happiness , but are looking for it at the wrong places and through the wrong means. We want to purchase happiness, thinking its transactional. We start bringing transactionality even in our close relations , many times manipulating relationships to seek happiness.
True happiness is non transactional and it is an outcome of unconditional loving and unconditional trust in the process of nature. We love unconditionally and we trust unconditionally. Yes we may get frustrated at times when we are not loved back or when our trust gets broken . We need to have faith in the law and process of nature and make our best effort in loving and trusting unconditionally for their is no other way to find happiness and joy.

Many times, when weare looking for a solution to a difficult problem, itout of eludes us no matter how hartd we try. But having kept the problem aside, suddenly , out of nowhere, the solution emerges.
Our overcharged mind,has limited scope to accomplish, but a quiet and a still mind can acheive unimaginable results.We can find newer meaning when we cede control of our mind to our higher self.
I can remeber SN Goenka, ji's audio , telling us to stop looking for bliss during Vipasaana meditation, Just concentrate on the breath, observe the senasations and if the practice is strong enough, bliss wil be there.

Wow. What a profound , hard hitting statement on religion. Apart from respecting other religions , it also shows us the path of true worship, which is without fear or reward and just in the spirit of service or unconditional love.
Am reminded of a mystic baba who had founded a big temple and almost a sect , in Delhi, whom i used to meet very regularly , sharing this with me. " Most of the people coming over here ( mostly rich and powerful), come here , either by fear or for reward . They look at the temple visit , either as a means to avoiid hardship or pain or a fulfillment of their wishes or some desire. I still welcome them, with a hope that some day they would see the futility of thier prayers and actually start worshipping just for the sake of worshipping/service or just ib the spirit of service with unconditional love for god and all humanity.

Recently attended a Vipassana Session. It is a place where one enjoys aloneness, as there is no phone , no net, no communication through speech or written, not even an eye contact for 10 days.
Real deep sense of fulfilment with this aloneness.

A wonderful passage. A healthy poverty , as per me , a state where small things bring a tremendous amount of pleasure.
one who is pleased with small things, events or happenings will always be a happy man. One who is happy and willing to be surprised and tremendously happy at those surprises is a truly happy man.

The nature is always whispering and showering pleasant surprises in our paths. We just need to be open, receptive and empty to receive them.
We are alaways so busy with out thoughts, our preconceived notions and "closed to receiving " surprises that we miss the "gold" in our paths

Wonderful.
Give with no expectations be it kindness, be it service, be it a smile ot be it something of a monetary value, not even expecting or waiting for a thank you.
Dont even bother whether a receipient is worthy of it or not. Have trust and faith in nature.

Mindfulness calling, listening, speaking, brings us back into awareness, that deep connect with ourselves.
It brings into picture the slow , planned , response or proactive conversation which is so vital in compassionate communication

 Wonderful piece of article. Jolts you up.

 So true. Even when people get unwell , they only look for a relief rather than a cure.
Relief is immediate but the Cure may be time consuming and may be painful too.
We are only looking for shortcuts rather than the mental or physical discipline required for the cure.
Its almost like saying “  O God , I would love to go heaven buutt can you make someone else die for me”