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Reader comment on Daniel Goleman's passage ...

Social Intelligence


On Mar 1, 2015 Colette wrote:

 well what i feel is this:     a reactive choice is a pattern or habit and although i cannot see what is happening on the quantum level, I have a choice about how i will respond or not respond, if i am in a place of awareness.....and in that there is freedom.
In the beginning i was unconscious of this choice and suffered.   Now if i am aware....and this is more often than previously ....i can see that the other person is acting in his pattern/habbit....according to his past experiences, cultural education etc.
So when we can create a few seconds of space between such an event and our response, we can choose HOW we respond.  We don't have to accept their gift of negativity.  They may offer it but we don't have to accept.
I think that catching strong emotions, assuggested in the above story is a habit.  It doesn't mean I don't feel the negativity, I would much rather experience positivity but I see it for what it is, a puff of smoke really, just passing by, like everything else, and i don't have to add anything to it from my side. 
I can see now why the saying "sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me" may have come into being.  They only have the power we give them.
We can choose to disempower ourselves, if that's we really want! 
Hanging on causes me discomfort.  I think the saints call this attachment. 
Maybe I'm finally getting it!



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