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Reader comment on Ezra Bayda's passage ...

Finding the Deepest Joy in Relationships


On Dec 26, 2012 Carrie wrote:

 I am one of those 20-somethings, if only for another year. I feel the anxiety of living in my current culture, and it does cripple me, making me blind to reality. It is such a challenge to live right now, for me personally, but I also think for my generation. I've grown up and become who I am very much on my own, which is unlike most people in my age-group, I think. Whereas most of my peers are quite dependent on their parents or other elders, I find myself being shut down, cutting people out of my life just because of how I grew up.

Regardless of those differences, however, I think many people my age feel an overwhelming sense of disconnect...from ourselves, from others, from the world. There are many movements (local economy, local food, small community development) that millenials are working towards, and these are steps in the right direction. These steps express a desire for that connectedness. But we're all still educated to think a specific way, and that if we work hard enough, we will get the life we want. But that is not true. When we live with that expectation (because we've been conditioned by our culture to expect it) and then fail to get the life we want, we have overwhelming anxiety. We feel duped. We realize the lie, but aren't educated in enough "right mindedness" to see our way out of it. Then we're trapped by the debt we agreed to in order to participate in this system, or we encounter health problems and accumulate debt that way.

Even now, I walk the path. I meditate. I read things that help build skillful practice, thoughts, and discourse. I practice yoga. I try to be mindful in all things. And yet, I lie awake at night with such anxiety, such a heavy heart over feeling trapped into a system I know is a lie by something as trivial as debt, whether for education or health matters not. I can see my fears. I can articulate them. I can even invite them in and sit with them a while. But learning to live in our current culture with this mindset is my greatest challenge. I wonder if that is a generational thing, or just a Western thing?



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