Reader comment on Angeles Arrien's passage ...
On Sep 13, 2011 Ricky wrote:|
I am uncomfortable with the last statement:
“The mark of a healthy person is someone who is comfortable with themselves, comfortable if they were to just hang out with one other person, and comfortable in a group or team.” Learning these processes is the work of a lifetime. Just the awareness of being uncomfortable gives us the opportunity for this growth (as stated in an earlier comment submission). We are not always unhealthy in the absence of the skills necessary to carry out these three processes. It is in the ‘aha’ of facing the idea we have different levels of comfort within ourselves that provides the opportunity to know when we can expand out and reveal who we are while working in a group perhaps, and then too know that we are not going to die when faced with revealing our true selves to just one other. If when we become aware and have no one to guide this newness, lacking confidence of listening and recognizing our inner guide, sometimes we do give up and become unhealthy. There is a distinct level of confidence gained in learning strategies to work through this new consciousness…this character development. This confidence signals to me that I am worthy as an individual-ok in my own skin-but also realizing that I am not separate-I have something to share with another and something to receive as well. The tyranny of judgment and expectation looms large in the infant stages of this awareness, and we need to recognize that our human journey is enhanced by choosing our one-on-ones and group work wisely. This is how the awareness of my comfort level with self, relationships, and community has helped me grow.