Reader comment on Jonathan Franzen's passage ...
On Jun 19, 2011 Ricky wrote:|
What I experienced just this past week was a personal twist to this story. I found that when stressed at work about work or even about impending changes at work with personnel and location, even the slightest perceived miscommunication set me off into a self-destructive internal dialogue. I actually internalized all actions around me must have been happening just to me. I closed myself off to others, isolated myself so I could wallow, and avoided coming into contact with any of my support system because I didn't want to be confronted with logic and wisdom!
Finally, I got quiet and still. The definition of courage by Dr. Brene Brown came to mind. She states that the original definition of courage from the Latin root cor, heart, was "To speak one's mind by telling all one's heart." During that very intimate quiet reflective time, then, two conversations with dear friends from long ago came to mind. The first was from my pastor who stated after listening to me express fear in the unknown concerning my career, "Apparently you are under the impression you actually have some sort of control in this matter." (in other words to me this means let it go) The second was from my master yoga teacher after I asked her why we suffer so about next steps and by other people who have our futures in their hands. (you see, this is always my practice) She said, "My goodness, you have fallen into ignorance and believe you are a person." (reminding me of the impermanence of all this)
I can't say that all is well, but I do know that how I treat other people around me includes using my 'cor', my heart, and again connecting to a deep sense of love for others as well as myself, embracing the journey I am presently on wrapped in this earthsuit. I feel as though I somehow began following a wellworn path and am now stepping out on my own, allowing santosha-contentment...one breath at a time.